![]() Along with other great nicknames in the NFL, such as The Steel Curtain and The Purple People Eaters, the Seahawks offense should have been called Three and Out. It always amuses me when modern Seahawks fans deride the offense when they go three-and-out. And they would finish the season with an NFL low 140 points scored. And you sure as hell don't tell anyone that you have these records.Īt one point in the season, the offense scored fewer points than the number of times it punted. You have to keep them, because they're "important," even though you dare not look at the oddly jocular faces peering out at you from behind their accordions. These were the shit records, like the collection of polka music LPs my wife inherited from my father-in-law. 292 win percentage.Īnd so, fans cursed Behring while simultaneously placing their hopes on the fragile body of Kelly Stouffer, who would soon be injured, replaced by McGwire, who himself would be injured, ceding the job to Stan Gelbaugh.īy the time Gelbaugh took over, the Seahawks had already embarked on several record-breaking adventures, and none of the good records, either. "Who are these people dressed in blue?" he seemed to wonder, "and why are they running like that?" The game had simply passed him by he would post a 14-34 record in his three seasons, a. ![]() Flores spent most games pacing the sidelines, chewing his nails, and looking generally befuddled. At first, Seahawks fans were excited: hey, this was a guy who coached the Raiders to the Super Bowl in 1983! But the "1983" part would be the damning part of the equation, and, by the time 1992 came around, Flores had been out of football for five years. Part two of the conspiracy would be Behring's hiring of Tom Flores to be the team's coach. ![]() Think about that for a second: the first-round draft choice could not perform marginally better than either Kelly Stouffer or Stan Gelbaugh. Of course, McGwire, the heir apparent to take over for Dave Krieg, couldn't even make it out of preseason, losing his supposed starting job to Kelly Stouffer and Stan Gelbaugh. As Seahawks fans would learn, McGwire, who was huge at 6 feet, 8 inches tall, ran as if some higher power had permanently tied his shoelaces together. Ken Behring thought Dan McGwire would become the team's starting quarterback, and historical records seem to indicate he said this to other people with a straight face. Part one of the conspiracy theory would go something like this: Dan McGwire, Kelly Stouffer, and Stan Gelbaugh, the unholy triumvirate of craptacular quarterback play. The "new" Seahawks were solely of Ken Behring's creation, and conspiracy theorists out there would have plenty of evidence in 1992 that Behring was attempting to destroy the franchise so he could move the team to the sunnier (and more profitable) climes of Los Angeles. And abstract concepts such as "winning" and "playoffs" had completely left the team entirely. And Krieg left the team during the offseason to join the Kansas City Chiefs. Warner went to join the Rams in 1990 and spent an ineffective year there. By 1992, the last remnant of Seattle's offensive trio-Steve Largent, Dave Krieg, and Curt Warner-had departed.
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